Trump Makes a “Very Big” Announcement

Trump Makes a “Very Big” Announcement


-Welcome to another special NFL post-game edition
of “The Tonight Show.” As always, thank you for having
us in your living room along with your one friend
who can’t take the hint hat it’s time
to leave after the game. [ Laughter ] “If you guys want to go to bed,
I can lock up.” [ Laughter ] Yeah, we’re coming you to
after tonight’s game between the
Packers and the Chiefs. Tonight was supposed to feature
two of the NFL’s best quarterbacks, Aaron Rodgers
and Patrick Mahomes. But Mahomes is still injured and a backup player
played in his place. -Oh.
-Yeah, for Chiefs fans, it’s basically like getting
tickets to “Hamilton” and then hearing, “Stepping in
for Lin-Manuel Miranda tonight will be Vanilla Ice.” [ Laughter and applause ] “Well, we already
got a sitter, right? Yeah, we got the sitter.
That’s good.” [ Laughter ] But tonight
was also a matchup between the new Packers
head coach Matt LaFleur and longtime
Chiefs coach Andy Reid. Can we see the two of them? Yeah. That’s basically how I
think I look in the morning versus how I actually look.
[ Laughter ] Oh, and I saw that
Rob Gronkowski said that he’d consider
coming out of retirement if the NFL lets players use CBD. -Ooh.
[ Audience “Oohs” ] -Then every current
NFL player was like, “Yes, and we would also like
to try CBD for the first time.” [ Laughter ] “We don’t know what that feels
like to try that.” [ Laughter ] But this is good.
Today, Saints quarterback Drew Brees was back on the field
after missing five games with a thumb injury. When asked how
it felt to be back out there, Brees was like, “Great!” [ Grunting ] Ohh, y-e-e-eah!” [ Laughter and applause ] -[ Laughing ] What? -“I feel awe-SOME!
Oh, yeah! Come on, now!
Yeah!” Well, football isn’t the only
thing going on right now. Last night,
President Trump tweeted, “Something very big
just happened.” [ Laughter ] Americans saw that
and were like, “You went five minutes
without tweeting?” But it turns out something
very big did just happen. -Last night, the United States brought the world’s number-one
terrorist leader to justice. Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi is dead. -Americans were shocked,
mostly that Trump was able to pronounce that name
on the first try. -Wow.
[ Laughter ] -“He did it!
Oh, God, he did it!” [ Laughter ] Trump was like, “That’s right.
We got Bag — Bag-daddy.” [ Laughter ] “Or as I call him,
B. Diddy.” [ Laughter ] Also, the White House sent out
a photo of the Situation Room during the mission.
Check this out. Yeah.
[ Laughter ] Can we see
what they were looking at? -Former White House
Press Secretary Sean Spicer! -Turn it off, turn it off,
turn it off, turn it off! [ Laughter ] -Oh! Spicer. -Of course, now ISIS
is looking for a new leader. At this point, the only jobs
tougher to fill right now are Trump’s chief of staff and
the head coach of the Jets. -Oh.
[ Laughter ] -They were able to find
the leader of ISIS in a very remote area. He almost got away, but then
his phone started ringing from a Rudy Giuliani butt-dial. [ Laughter ] Did you hear about this? It came out that
Rudy Giuliani accidentally — Rudy Giuliani accidentally
butt-dialed an NBC reporter… [ Laughter ] …and was overheard
talking about Joe Biden. Yeah, a butt-dial.
It’s actually pretty impressive, because Rudy uses a flip phone.
-Really? [ Laughter ] Beep boop boop boop. Beep beep boop boop boop
beep beep beep. [ Imitates ringing ]
[ Laughter ] -“I need dirt on Joe Biden.” This is cool.
I saw that CNN made a guide to help people figure out
if their Halloween costume is appropriate or not. Here’s a tip. If you need to use the guide,
it’s not appropriate. Just trust your gut on that. Yeah, the guide ranges
from Princess all the way down
to Slutty O.J. Simpson. -Oh.
[ Laughter ] -Hey, check this out.
I read about a message in a bottle from New Jersey
that washed up in Newfoundland. -Oh.
-Yeah, it was the first time someone opened a message in a
bottle and all it said was, “What are you looking at?”
[ Laughter ] -Beep boop boop.
Beep beep. Beep beep boop boop boop. Beep.
[ Light laughter ] [ Imitates ringing ] -“Honey, I’m gonna be late.” [ Laughter ] -Sorry, I didn’t catch that.
-No, all right. [ Laughter ] -A Siri butt-dial?
-I don’t know what’s happening. [ Laughter ]

Author:

100 thoughts on “Trump Makes a “Very Big” Announcement”

  • When I saw that "Something very big just happened!" tweet, I was sure Donnie meant to text his doctor about that particular bowel movement. Easy enough mistake, he was almost certainly on the can at the time.

  • Cringe Master 9000 says:

    Even when Trump does something great people canโ€™t fucking acknowledge it and have to turn that into a joke. Um how about THANK YOU TRUMP FOR SENDING PEOPLE TO KILL THE LEADER OF ISIS????…Fucking idiots…

  • Isnโ€™t it strange that no one could find him for the past 3 years and the moment Trump let Turkey do what it wants in that region, all of a sudden you guys were โ€˜toldโ€™ where Baghdadi was? Everything is a deal to that Orange isnโ€™t it? Hr wanted a major talking point for the upcoming elections and for everyone to not focus on the impeachment. So basically, he asked Turkey to do him favor and in return he did them a favor : Quid Pro Quo!

  • ๐Œ๐˜ ๐…๐€๐Œ๐ˆ๐‹๐˜ ๐“๐‡๐ˆ๐๐Š๐’ ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡บะ ั“ัั•ั–โ†ัะธั‚ ะ“ั“ั†ะผั€๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡บ* ๐ข๐ฌ ๐š ๐๐š๐ง๐ ๐ž๐ซ๐จ๐ฎ๐ฌ, ๐๐ž๐ฌ๐ฉ๐ž๐ซ๐š๐ญ๐ž, ๐œ๐จ๐ซ๐ง๐ž๐ซ๐ž๐, ๐ข๐ง๐ก๐ฎ๐ฆ๐š๐ง๐ž, ๐ฆ๐š๐ฅ๐ข๐ ๐ง๐š๐ง๐ญ ๐ง๐š๐ซ๐œ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฌ๐ข๐ฌ๐ญ ๐ฐ๐ก๐จ ๐ข๐ฌ
    ฤฆษ‡ล‚ล‚ ษƒษ‡nลง ๐จ๐ง ๐๐จ๐ข๐ง๐  ๐š๐ฌ ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐œ๐ก ๐œ๐จ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐š๐ญ๐ž๐ซ๐š๐ฅ ๐๐š๐ฆ๐š๐ ๐ž ๐š๐ฌ ๐ฉ๐จ๐ฌ๐ฌ๐ข๐›๐ฅ๐ž ๐ญ๐จ ๐€๐ฆ๐ž๐ซ๐ข๐œ๐š๐ง๐ฌ. ๐“๐ก๐ข๐ฌ "๐ƒ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐› ๐‚๐ซ๐จ๐จ๐ค ๐‚๐จ๐ฆ๐ž๐๐ฒ/๐“๐ซ๐š๐ ๐ž๐๐ฒ ๐’๐ก๐จ๐ฐ" ๐ก๐š๐ฌ
    ๐›๐ž๐œ๐จ๐ฆ๐ž ๐Ÿ๐ซ๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ญ๐ž๐ง๐ข๐ง๐  ๐ญ๐จ ๐ฎ๐ฌ ๐š๐ฌ ๐ก๐ž ๐œ๐จ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐š๐ง๐๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ก๐ž ๐ง๐ฎ๐œ๐ฅ๐ž๐š๐ซ ๐œ๐จ๐๐ž๐ฌ! ๐‹๐Ž๐‘๐ƒ ๐‰๐„๐’๐”๐’, ๐‡๐„๐‹๐ ๐”๐’ ๐€๐‹๐‹. ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡บ* Russian flag

  • Manthan Chilweri says:

    People keep blaming trump. But what you should be doing is to look at the positives and development that the United States has had in his time. This event is an evidence of this.

  • Nothing like joking when talking about the death of a man responsible for killing so many people. Theres time for joking and times you shouldn't. This was one of those shouldn't times. Not only did he kill himself but he also killed three of his own children. How about instead of joking about how trump pronounces names you take a moment to thank our troops. Thank the fact they got out ok…. just saying…..

  • Lets see they got Pablo Escobar, and there are still drugs if not more coming in to America!.We went to war with the wrong Country in Iraq, but hey we are here lets take out Saddam, we took out Osama Bin Laden still have terrorist, now we took out the current leader of ISIS and guess what there will be another too take his place, this will never end….this is like disturbing a bee hive!….RUN!…….Oh, it was nice to see a unbiased crowd BOO his majesty….but guess what he will be in Texas to redeem himself in all his glory!….

  • Funny. DNA test are notorious in the law enforcement community as taking weeks, sometimes months, to return results. Yet a few soldiers in the field in the middle of a war zone can return results in just a few hours.

  • Wow, I remember when Obama got Bin Laden and the liberal press and all the talk shows were treating Obama like he was a great leader. Trump gets an even bigger terrorist than Bin Ladenย was and people make fun of him. Hey, Jimmy. Children died in the raid you fucking tool. Show some fucking class.ย Why don't you actually work for a living instead of coming out on stage every night and behaving like a twit. You ain't no Johnny Carson. Carson had class. All you have is booze breath. ( Yeah everyone knows that you are a drunk Jimmy ) Fucking loser.

  • One down thousands more to go…Just because his dead doesnโ€™t mean the battle is over they already have someone taking his place…Thank you to our soldiers.

  • Yea no ahit he is dead…๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚….u pull out troops and bam 3 weeks later he is dead๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚…us has become a joke๐Ÿ˜‚

  • Meanwhile in Huge news = The US Army has signed up to study real UFO metal debris according to all the media.

    https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/opinion/us-army-signs-contract-to-study-ufo-material-and-make-better-weapons

  • I think a previous White House photographer took a look at that picture and says the timestamp on the photo showing Trump watching the attack was incorrect

  • B Daniels Official says:

    He had to conjure up something to hopefully get peoples attention off of what a miserable lying piece of shit he is and that he's being impeached for committing multiple high crimes. Don't get distracted

  • Damn, just watching this clip of Fallon, seems like he's kind of bombing. I haven't really watched The Tonight Show since for a couple of years now because he just doesn't stack up to his predecessors. Sad. Thought he could do a better job .

  • Lovely anti-American cowards who talk shit about an American President that is not a globalist unlike the last 4 Presidents.

  • Total bullshit! He's getting impeached, pulls troops from war with ISIS (Syria) and then after the damning testimony from 2 top officials, ISIS leader is dead!? Stfu Trump!

  • Jimmy's audience is killing him. Funny stuff and they don't laugh. Someone……not Jimmy……..needs to be fired….TODAY!

  • I'm amazed that our talkative 'Kid Bone Spurs' didn't somehow manage to eff up the whole operation in advance. The adults probably informed him just seconds before the whole thing happened.

  • WE all need to wake up fastl says:

    I have to give him a thumbs-up on this one because he didn't spend all of his time just dogging our president of our great country thank you I appreciate it and I'm sure others do too

  • You are EVIL!!! Jimmy Fallon!!! A satanic devoid of talent foul mouthed idiot. Shame on you! God and Jesus Christ are shaking their heads observing your horrific behavior and pathetic jokes

  • Damn this jerkoff took a serious downfall since SNL. Fallon how long are u going to keep being a media sellout and using fake laughs. Your comedy suxx. Literally itโ€™s fkn retarded

  • Trump administration just keeps getting things done even without the DemocRATS,great job keep up the good work ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ

  • Paul Sommerhalder says:

    Jimmy's "signature" hairdo looks especially animated in this clip. Please stop copying Conan, you are more universally "liked" than Mr. TBS and that's enough.

  • The president kills the most wanted terrorist leader and they make fun of him. I dont get it ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿฝโ€โ™‚๏ธ

  • Rebecca Peterson says:

    Trump has to make โ€œbig announcementsโ€. Itโ€™s how psychopaths, like him, keep their facade of greatness in tact. Educate yourselves on psychopaths. Google the PCL-R by Dr. Robert Hare.

  • Baghdadi was killed by US-led operatives in 2015. Dr. Seb Gorka, antiterrorism expert, tweeted it. Obama got so mad he reported this truth on his Harvard alumni friend that he got Dr. Gorka fired. That was a tyrannical govt. We have a tyrannical govt now. Our Presidents have been career criminals!

  • Tweeted
    @FallonTonight – Trump announces he took Harvard grad Baghdadi out of his 4+-yr old grave and killed him. Apparently he wasn't willing to go peacefully.
    https://youtu.be/yGSPFQYiLOw

  • As a white man, I'm going as a black trans sexual, trans woman with an skeleton baby who was anti vax with trump pins on me.

  • Maybe things will change when the declass and the F.I.S.A. are released and high profile arrests happen and the real truth comes out

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *