Jokes Seth Can’t Tell: Black Conservative Running for Congress, United Methodist Church

-Here at “Late Night,” every night, I deliver a monologue comprised of jokes written by a diverse team of writers. As a result, a lot of jokes come across my desk that due to my being a straight white male would be difficult for me to deliver, but we don’t think that should stop you from enjoying them. […]

Philip Rucker and Carol Leonnig Almost Interviewed with Trump for A Very Stable Genius

-There’s long been this idea that there were people — And you even lay it out in the beginning of this book, that there were two people who would work for Trump right off the beginning — people who wanted to help him basically discard the way we’ve done things and do this — take this new path […]

Meanwhile… Sex Warning Issued For Athlete Beds At Tokyo Olympics

YOU KNOW, I SPEND A LOT OF TIME RIGHT OVER THERE, USING THE RAW MATERIAL OF THE DAY’S BIGGEST STORIES TO CAREFULLY PLAN, DESIGN, AND BUILD FOR YOU THE FIVE-STAR LUXURY HOTEL THAT IS MY MONOLOGUE. ( LAUGHTER ) BUT SOMETIMES I LIKE TO LOAD UP MY TRUCK WITH SOME RUSTY CORRUGATED TIN, OLD LOADING DOCK PALETTES, AND […]

Tamron Hall: I Had Four Days Of Pure Anxiety Prepping For Oprah Interview

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY NEXT GUEST TONIGHT IS A JOURNALIST AND FORMER CO-HOST OF THE “TODAY SHOW.” SHE NOW HOSTS HER OWN TALK SHOW. PLEASE WELCOME TAMRON HALL! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING )>>HI!>>Stephen: HELLO. HELLO.>>Stephen: NICE TO MEET YOU. I DON’T THINK WE’VE MET BEFORE. I THINK I’VE JUST WATCHED YOU ON TV SO […]

Giuliani Acted With Trump’s “Knowledge And Consent” When Conspiring With Parnas In Ukraine

WELCOME ONE AND ALL, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IN HERE, OUT THERE, ALL AROUND THE WORLD TO “THE LATE SHOW,” I’M YOUR HOST STEPHEN TEACH, AND IT IS — ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) — AN HISTORIC DAY IN AN-MERICA BECAUSE TODAY, THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES FORMALLY SENT ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT TO THE SENATE TO BEGIN THE TRIAL OF […]

Laura Dern On Baby Yoda: I Don’t Mind Being The Taller One

>>Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY, WELCOME BACK. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST GUEST IS AN EMMY AWARD-WINNING ACTOR YOU KNOW FROM “BIG LITTLE LIES,” “TWIN PEAKS,” AND “JURASSIC PARK.” SHE JUST WON A GOLDEN GLOBE FOR HER ROLE IN “MARRIAGE STORY.” PLEASE WELCOME TO “THE LATE SHOW,” LAURA DERN. ♪ ♪ ♪ ( APPLAUSE )>>WOW! I LOVE– I LOVE BEING […]

Stephen Colbert’s Interview Of Fox News’ Interview Of President Trump

>>AND, NOW, “THE LATE SHOW” EXCLUSIVE STEPHEN COLBERT’S INTERVIEW OF FOX NEWS’ INTERVIEW OF PRESIDENT TRUMP.>>Stephen: MR. PRESIDENT, THANK YOU FOR JOINING ME THIS MORNING.>>IT’S TOO EARLY.>>Stephen: I’M SORRY. I KNOW YOU RARELY PUT ON PANTS BEFORE NOON. SIR, LET’S TALK ABOUT THE STRIKE ON SOLEIMANI. IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN THE RIGHT MOVE, I DON’T KNOW, BUT ONE […]

Aaron Paul Struggled Before Landing His “Breaking Bad” Role

SAY HI TO AARON PAUL, EVERYBODY!>>HOW YOU DOING? ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) WHAT A NICE CROWD.>>Stephen: VERY NICE, VERY NICE. YEAH, PEOPLE LOVE AARON PAUL. PEOPLE LOVE AARON PAUL.>>I LOVE YOU ALL. I LOVE YOU ALL.>>Stephen: AND WHY SHOULD THEY NOT? YOU KNOW, WE’VE MET BEFORE.>>YEAH.>>Stephen: AND YOU KNOW THAT I’M A FAN BECAUSE “BREAKING BAD” WAS […]

President Trump Responds to Iran’s Retaliation

-Let’s get to the news. President Trump gave an address this morning in response to Iran’s retaliation for his strike on a military leader. The address was Hillary Clinton’s. [ Laughter ] President Trump this morning accused last night’s strike by Iran on U.S. targets as being funded by money given to them under the Obama-era nuclear deal. […]

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