Breaking News: Tekashi Escaped Prison

Breaking News: Tekashi Escaped Prison


Reporter Voice: We apologize for the technical difficulties as we bring you this exclusive breaking news. Rapper Tekashi 6IX9INE has escaped from prison after an apparent breakdown  in a plea agreement that would have allowed the rapper to go free. Tekashi feared his reputation would have taken too big of a hit if he were a known informant and thus, formed a plan to escape Moments ago, the FBI released a snapshot of Tekashi escaping and announced that another inmate escaped with him They say that this escape was so elaborate, they didn’t realize who all escaped until Today Investigator: We have been working since saturday morning on this case. They’re putting in all the effort they can. We’re talking about two men who are very elusive. They came up with a very elaborate and creative plan to escape one of the most secure prisons in the United States. So that’s what we’re defending right now. Reporter Voice: An anonymous source close to the investigation says Bill Cosby has been identified as the second escapee and is already in custody after a black Maserati was seen throwing him back on the doorstep of the prison before speeding away.  The FBI Says embattled singer, R Kelly appears to have broken out of jail himself and fled to his New York mansion and they identified him as a passenger in that Maserati. We caught up with Harry Wrangler, the owner of the Maserati and R Kelly’s Uber driver.  He says R Kelly was so scared about his charges in Chicago that he needed to use Tekashi as a way to negotiate his escape to another country Harry Wrangler: “I Pull up, it’s R. Kelly’s house. He told me to turn off my GPS Tracking. He said “don’t say anything” I turned it off He hands me a thousand dollars. I say, I don’t say anything. About 45 minutes to an hour later, we pull up to a jail. So we pull up, I look over. I see Bill Cosby and Tekashi running out. They’re going through a little hole in the fence. He said “don’t say anything” and handed me another 1000 dollars. I’m not saying anything because I need the money right now. So I’m not saying anything. So they hop in the car Bill Cosby started acting crazy. R. Kelly got mad because he caught Bill Cosby putting vitamins into the sippy cups. And you know you don’t put the vitamins in the sippy cups. Everybody knows that So we get back to the prison and kick Bill Cosby out. I look back and I think Tekashi might have drank from the baby cup. He’s knocked out and passed out. I look back at R. Kelly and ask him what he wanted to do and he said “Take me back to the house” So I didn’t say anything” Reporter Voice: Our source says that as soon as Kelly and Tekashi arrived at his New York Lake Front mansion, the FBI quickly surrounded the house.  Kelly immediately barricaded himself in, and began trying to negotiate a trade for Tekashi.  This is the same mansion R Kelly originally bought with Kevin Spacey and Bryan Singer with the dream of creating a Youth Talent Camp.  The mansion came with a playground, an indoor pool, a bowling alley, a recording studio, and a classroom themed escape room.   however,  R Kelly eventually kicked the pair out of his club after a dispute over who gets priority over the film equipment.  Our source with the FBI says it was at this time that R Kelly began demanding a plane ticket to Naruba in exchange for the safe return of Tekashi.   However, unbeknownst to Mr. Kelly, the commotion woke Tekashi from his nap and he was able to break free and escape from the rear courtyard of the mansion.  Tekashi immediately ran to the authorities and began telling on everyone he knew.  Tekashi could be heard complaining that a return to prison as an informant would be the same as being in prison with 1000 R. Kelly’s.  The FBI says Tekashi’s fear was enough for him to scream “It’s Them Way” and finally take the plea deal.  Tekashi even told on Harry Wrangler for running a few red lights and driving without insurance. Live from another dimension, I’m iShatonu, WFKE News.  

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