4AM - The Greg Gutfeld Show 7/28/19 | Fox News Today July 28, 2019

4AM – The Greg Gutfeld Show 7/28/19 | Fox News Today July 28, 2019

he's only cocaine Mitch if he's running cocaine to Moscow because he's Moscow Mitch and he's morning bozo [Applause] well they called it a hearing but it was more like hard-of-hearing can you repeat the question sir I could you repeat that place you have to repeat that's mine could you repeat that ma'am and you repeat the last part of that question I apologize can you start it again I'm sorry could you again repeat the question I'm sorry what was he what was the question now it could be that he was trying to run out the clock because for every repeat question he asked you lose the time available for a new question I try this when Fox News questions the purchases on my corporate credit card I purchased a lot of leather goods for charitable purposes but man did that hearing tank how bad was it worse than this worse than this and worse than this already said I will not be making any comment at least the media took it well I thought he was boring he kind of sucked the life at a report out of the report let's not kid ourselves this has been a wall-to-wall failure this whole hearing that we watched today was was pretty close to a disaster I think history will judge Muller somewhat harshly here if any one of those people knew that this is what would happen today shame on them no shame on you you for building this up like it was the second coming remember the hype leading up to this crap the Dems in the media thought they were getting a puppy for their birthday instead they got rabies they wanted The Godfather and got Godfather 3 they wanted Jerry Maguire and instead Jerry Springer you can feel the soul-crushing disappointment it's like when your date shows up and she doesn't look at all like her picture and her online profile you know you expect this and instead you get this and I tricked if to you I could have been more honest so it's not Muller's fault no it's the media who encouraged the Dems to pursue this circus I call it stupid on stupid crime no wonder nothing was in his purview this is outside my purview it's outside my purview and it's outside my purview outside my purview that's not in my purview and that's beyond my purview it's not within my purview this is still outside my purview as I said before I say again it's not my purview purview now there is an idea for a show starring cats with strong political opinions so bad I don't need your pity plus I do need it all right but it was never about collusion that was just a charade used to nail Trump remember the media frothing now over Russia are the same jerks who mocked those who fought communism when the USSR was eight times larger but I get it the Dems have a problem in that America has no problems except the ones that Democrats create so do the Democrats have nothing the Democrats had nothing and now they have less than nothing and you still ask the question you know why and you still ask the question you know why because you're fake dudes and you're one of the most and let me just tell you the fact that you even ask that question you're fake news because you know what he totally corrected himself in the afternoon and you know that just as well as anybody in case you missed it again your fake news again your fake news and you're right at the top of the list also that's why people don't deal with you because you're not an honest reporter why would he say that no no a very dumb and very unfair question duh duh a very dumb and very unfair question so you shouldn't even ask that question because you know it's your phone I wonder if you are untruthful when you ask that question you're right and if you were every truthful so who's done a great job the administration our president me you've done a great job [Applause] the president me they're having fun I mean the Trump campaign is now selling plastic straws the first batch sold out it's a great idea take something the left demonizes and poke them in the eyes with it it made 200 grand but it also exposes the left's absurd priorities think about what liberal policies have led to they've ruined cities screwed up law enforcement handicapped borders eliminated jobs created education and housing bubbles but a turtle might get a straw in the eye believe me I love turtles the soups not bad but more tour turtles get run over by liberals on the way to their homes in the Hamptons then by straws meanwhile meanwhile truck shows how the new Republican Party can harness the power of mockery long the turf solely owned by the smirking left now the libs are cranky old farts shakin their ray cat those teens on skateboards and the right are the ones laughing their asses off sipping whiskey from plastic straws but and you know the Trump campaign shouldn't stop with the straws I see a whole product rollout based on scary stuff he's so patriotic the American flag salutes him box of French weekend co-hosts Pete hagseth he's got friends in really high places theologian ethicists and Fox News contributor Jonathan Morris she's outspoken when she's not token hosted sincerely cats on fascination Catherine temp he's larger than life and basically most other things my Matson sidekick and host of enough said on Fox Nation Tyrus Pete I was watching the responses I don't think it's fair to blame Muller he didn't do you I don't think he wanted to be there they should blame themselves for pushing this charade course he didn't want to be there he he wrote a report he didn't write it yeah he had everyone else write it he put his name on top of it didn't even read it himself yeah and then when he didn't want to talk about it he gave a press conference where he took no questions it was totally scripted so that could be the end of it but then he became a private citizen and as a result they could subpoena him and he was forced to testify right then at the last minute we found out his lawyer was going to come with him and one thought why's that happening well of course we know why now he doesn't know the report yeah terrible so I mean I kind of felt bad because John and I I really did I mean listen this is a guy Bronze Star with valor in Vietnam yeah like a legitimate American Hero done a lot of great service to this country maybe hired the wrong people to do the investigation maybe the wrong motives I don't know but it was a sham and a charade and the Democrats should own it all the way I agree and you know what it reminds me of Jonathan and Matt because you used to be a priest it would be like me calling you up after you've left the priesthood and said can you come into a confession over the weekend he doesn't do confessions anymore – sigh I hear them I just can't do anything about that yeah what did you make it this week I felt I thought felt bad not just for Muller but for the American people that hundreds of people would be in this room talking about something that was not really that important for the end game of a nation that's stronger a nation that's safer a nation that helps people become the people that they can be on their own instead it was the political class trying to gain points from the other side yep which is just very sad no you're right you're right I just love it cat did they eat at that media they're eating more crow than my cousin Steve and he needs yeah he owns a crow farm but he raises he raises the birds for nourishment he needs a lot of crow is he single yes he is you will never have to starve again excellent sounds like my dream I quit tomorrow yeah look nobody found out anything new right from this hearing like except maybe Robert Muller yeah same stories over and over again if I wanted to hear the same stories over and over again I would go to the bar find the drunkest person they're probably named Chad and talk to him for a little while but at least Chad would probably have the decency to buy me a shot at some point so I could have something to help me get through it the congressional Democrats didn't do that no they didn't buy me any shot no no in fact you paid thirty million dollars for that travesty yeah that's one hell of a shot Yeah right Tyrus yep hell of a shot Greg nice job farming crows all right let's talk about it yes I don't know maybe I don't think I'm alone I'm just gonna keep it real I didn't watch it [Laughter] I had a great day I got up went and lift some weights yes then I went to this new breakfast spot yeah we're supposed to get egg white omelet but nobody was watching so I just got a regular one where am I at now like around 11:30 ish yeah then I went got stuff to feed my shark wait lady shark yeah shark of a horn shark in a fish tank and then I fed him some shrimp and his little eel buddies then I went outside watched my daughter play with her friends I've had a beer had another beer started giving my daughter life advice where we at now about 2:15 yes took a nap in a chair woke up with makeup on my face kinda fell asleep in my 5 year olds a monster 4:15 got in trouble with the missus for drinking beer around the kids again 6 o'clock I ate again was supposed to eat something healthy but I had burgers and hot dogs on the grill mm-hmm another beer took a nap again yes binge watched some stuff on Netflix you learn anything tyrunt's flip the channel said Oh Matt Miller was on the day Thank You hey guess what what I knew the same thing before I did afterwards cuz when it first came out I watched it and I read it yeah nothing changed yes exactly so yeah I had a great day that's the difference between you and a Democrat the Democrats keep watching the same thing hoping at the ending changes they keep thinking that the Titanic is not gonna hit the iceberg it keeps hitting the iceberg – be shouting push-ups and punches we discussed the desperate Democrats next competition is now their ammunition in the wake of Joe Biden's call for a push-up contest with Trump bado or Rourke was spotted in an airport challenging his staffers to a push-up contest prompting many to ask who is beta or orc why is he still here meanwhile Cory Booker visited something called Late Night with Seth Meyers I'm told it's a TV show where he said he felt like punching president Trump he puts his arm around me and he goes dude I want you to punch the hole Trump in the face and I stopped in my tracks and I go dude that's a felony man that Donald Trump is a guy who you understand he hurts you and you in my testosterone sometimes makes me want to feel like punching him and which would be bad for this elderly out of shape man that he is guys guys guys all this tough talk is making me hot all this overflowing testosterone you can smell it coming off them why not just settle it in the ring sunday sunday sunday get ready to be utterly impressed featuring the newer nobody the tough-talking testosterone time bomb Cory buh buh buh buh girl as he tries to out beta the cruisin for a losin bado is actually I have a theory that they're responding to the supportive media who are trying to tell them they have to act tough to fight Donald Trump so they're overcompensating in a way what do you make of these I love the fact that the only thing they're talking about is Donald Trump right they're not talking about any issues whatsoever mm-hmm they're talking about they're doing push-ups yes they're competing against their staff in push-ups and then they're talking about Donald Trump right and that doesn't work yeah because Donald Trump has been president and he is doing things like them or not he's doing things yeah and that's what they have to compete against and they're not they're just talking about how he is well that they can beat them up and punch them and other things like that ridiculous yeah yeah you know cat I know this is a big issue for you push-ups yes battle roar watches the Greg Gutfeld yes yes as I said last week that the only thing that matters to me in a candidate is push-ups I'm influencing the right but the Cory Booker thing bothered me not so much because of what he said but because of what wasn't included in the clips which is before he said all these things he says I don't want to stoop to president Trump's level of my body shaming him and then that's what me mean me middle school girls do they're like I don't want to be mean but Jessica's nose is huge and I hate her you weren't trying to be mean I just if you're gonna be me be like I'm gonna be mean which is something I appreciate about Trump he's not like not to me he just yes they never do he never conditions his insults hi Reza yeah you bought punched a lot of people um do you think it's weird to hear positively the statute of limitations right now Brady I'm free and clear at the moment are we really sure I'm good at a few scraps in my day yeah and I never talked like that before I hate to bring up my testosterone here guys with all you guys I knew that talk like that we're guys who are afraid to fight they they give a reasons of all the things they have I know karate and I have a toaster and I have a lot of anger but I'm gonna refrain and swinging on you because you know I don't want to be in court that usually means I want to get beat up yeah and what is and if President Trump he'll beat him up before you even get to the fight because I'll be in his head yeah I guarantee you if they square off mr. Booker will be crying before he throws the punch because president Trump's don't talk about his mama yeah talk about him talk everything about him he wins he gets broken up he's crying presses will look at he's crying he wins yeah so yeah wrong well I do go back to the tape it's not clear that beta O'Rourke could even beat Robert Francis of work could even beat Trump he couldn't beat his own staffer yeah I miss that one no yeah to the right of it but the guy further but was smoking yeah yeah so he's got no shot I mean this is this is the the last and lowest common denominator of politics when you hate somebody you go to a fistfight you can't figure it out with words you're gonna fight it out and they don't have anything to say he can't differentiate himself from other politicians I mean I will guarantee you one thing right now cory booker will never be President as States push-ups they want but it's it's background knowing Cory will not be President if he'll be he'll be one hell of a personal trainer yeah I think you could do it I know you can do that that's how cory booker talks because it's like he ate a slice of my pizza my mouth is on fire do grocery checkout lines make you racist sure why not president Trump is facing backlash for calling a Democratic lawmakers district rat-infested the president also called congressman Elijah Cummings a bully for condemning the treatment of migrants at the us-mexico border Cummings is a chairman of the House Oversight Committee thousands including celebrities and lawmakers are now using the hashtag we are Baltimore in a show of solidarity with the city overseas at least eight people are dead after earthquakes rocked the northern Philippines dozens are injured the quakes destroyed homes with some residents still pinned inside at least three quake struck today two were back to back earthquakes happen frequently in the Philippines because it lies on the so called Ring of Fire I maestro Hassan II now back to the Greg Gutfeld show for all your headlines like onto Fox news.com is it worth it to fight him if they've got more than 10 items a police report is disputing the account of a Democratic Georgia lawmaker who is black who claimed that a white man told her to go back where you came from during a tip at a grocery store now the argument didn't start over race or politics or even Trump it started when the guy said she had too many items in the express lane here's her original account what had white men it covered to me it caught me instead of a lazy and go back where I came from because he had a couple items he wanted to get in front of me and he said I had 20 items in a tonight of lie whoa make you that angry she later backtracked on the racism thing maybe because a witness told police it was the lawmaker who actually told the guy to go back where he came from surveillance footage showed what happened but you can't hear anything nothing outrages seemed to have occurred yet this whole thing exploded because the woman injected race into the matter and then spread it all over social media still police aren't filing any charges against anyone but the lesson is clear if you've got more items and the limit allows then go back where you came from and put it back on the shelf and then come back go back to the loop then look the lane where you got two cans of tomato soup all right Tyrus um I think they're both jackasses cuz I think he called her some bad names and she exaggerated this but I could totally understand this fight happening cuz it bothers me when people have too many and I go grocery shopping Greg I have people do it and they get mad for me okay all right well I still do grocery shopping yes and I'm a stickler with the express lane I don't play that at all almost did it but I didn't do it always I didn't do it if you if it's ten items or less I think the gray area is 12 yes say something yes and if someone tells me to go back where I'm coming from they're gonna fly there first [Laughter] no cat I'm gonna ask you if this is a serious question because I don't know where anybody stands in this do four containers of yogurt count as four or one item if it were no no counting yes but it's okay but are they connected well no let's say yogurt doesn't come connected four yogurts four separate item four cans of tomato sauce in which you do store evers four cans of tomatoes yes yes god knows what you do with it yeah but anyone does now okay what are your thoughts does he know she confessed it in the green room all right this conflict my thoughts yes that I wouldn't notice if someone had a thousand items in front of me because I would be on my phone yes people say that it's so that cat you're on your phone all the time look around that's not how we sound yes it is to me and you know what turns out that I'm keeping myself on it quite a lot of trouble till you get hit by a truck that would be trouble again alright hexif I don't mean this guy gets called her names that was wrong lazy B word yeah did he actually came back and yelled at her but he's also she can see he's a he hates Trump he's a king his Democrat is a Democrat weight struck so she created us a political story out of nothing which isn't fair she made it at a race by the way in the future every press conference that's held should have both sides at the podium at the same time yes you see the press conference standing next to each other landing their versions of events refuting each other in real-time read of all its but there's nothing worse than coming out with a one-sided story making it all about race really it was contentious about any number of matters but to inject that at the beginning he's defending himself listen I agree you go in you make a Russ rough estimation of how many cards on the items in your car I always view it a little bit I'm like in yeah I think I'm good if there's no big line and no one behind me that I'll go for it whatever there's not then I will by the way let's be honest if if the person in front of you is kind of good-looking yeah then I'm okay yes there's a lot of caveats it's a guy who's like besides it's time retirees you can have 60 item go with a man go with it we know we're not gonna day you know yeah father Jonathan I love that fact that I have to be the fourth person to talk about this story right complicated yes first of all 12 definitely is about the number this was twenty I mean I'm all about mercy but that is alive I happen to believe that I can get pretty emotional over really small things in fact I only get emotional or smog I've gotten very angry and then when you get mad at somebody you create a story around it and then you realize it didn't happen hasn't anybody front them in real time though no I Drive all the way home and sends a scathing midnight's slightly drunk all right I think they both did wrongs above earlier this month France a country celebrated Bastille Day with a military parade where a guy comes flying in on a hoverboard holding a rifle in France turns out it wasn't a baguette this thing is called the flyboard and the guy on it is the inventor and this scared the hell out of me until the same guy tried to cross the English Channel on the same thing this week and he fell in the water after 15 minutes so I was feeling less scared until I saw this a flamethrower attached to a personal drone that is the TF 19 wasp it's made by a company called throw flame of course it's not necessary bucks it could shoot flames 25 feet with 90 seconds of pure brutal Hellfire check out their ad with an onboard fpv camera pilots have a real-time view to navigate confidently through complex environments constructed from ultralight 3k carbon fiber the TF 19 wasp is built to support maximum flight time holding strength parapa instantly deliver precision streams of fire with the TF 19's high-powered plasma ignition system a game-changer for clearing vital infrastructure igniting remote vegetation and eliminating pests the wasp attachment is a versatile fit for any system and capable of any mission no matter how tough holy crap apparently it's ideal for clearing brush eliminating pests and making s'mores I made up that last part don't make s'mores you'll die all right Pete you want one of those I want one of those all of us do I support all death from above this sounds more efficient than others yeah they left out smoking Isis Oh something that it could be used for right but they're they sold it as look at this right here this video is smoking out a hornet's nest yes exactly I usually run up to them with the bat yeah and then run away really fast but I will say about the French Bastille Day with the guy yeah was that their only soldier I know it was the best he's on a hoverboard there weren't many of them oh my god say that was a jab Jonathan you know humans they like to combine things you know remember what ice cream was just ice cream and then he started folding in stuff like toffee bits and then you add beer Kaddatz with axe with beer cans now we're combining drones and flamethrowers what is with us the only thing I could think of when I was watching this and also when I reviewed the segment and notes was way to get on a special report oh they review segment notes before yes the only thing I could think of us thank God I don't I mean I don't have the eve even they into the interest in knowing any of the stuff that Greg seems to be so fascinated that he would have this like part of his show be about this yes right like how would you even find that that stuff exists you have to be trolling the internet yes looking for weird stuff I have like I have Google alerts for flame throwers and leather onesies when they cross my night is made Tyrus my night is made its leather onesies and flamethrowers for everyone alright Tyrus I'll pass thanks yes you know uh Wow you know the the next commercial is you know for the murder and you who doesn't feel like getting out of the chair pesky neighbor loud barking dog not a problem like you think about it I mean that's the you're marrying yeah we're married violence two things above you it's a hornet's nest are a huge problem United States why we need a Jerome to fly in from above and shoot a spray that Game of Thrones wish they could have recreated yes though there's that here's the scary part that's the one that's made for the public yeah which means the drones and the military boots on the ground is an old-time term now yeah because this is going to be drones from above and they don't look like little spiders and it's game over I think that's what we can buy imagine what they got yeah I think this is good a cat this is good this this is gonna eliminate a lot of the food this is the future of warfare right yeah I'm an expert on the future of what Brett he's not watching yeah he's not no yeah it is and that's fine but I kind of want to talk about the the France thing yes okay because when I was watching this story I was like isn't it interesting how CNN was just fine with this cuz its France imagine if Donald Trump had a guy in a hoverboard with a gun they'd be like they're the Republicans go murdering people you they seem to equate supporting the second amendment which is in the Constitution and totally your right to do so with murder somehow but just because it was French people they're just like oh whatever Bonjour and by the way I guess they're okay with the Bastille parade of Casteel daybreak well couldn't Trump get the idea for the tank parade from the Bastille / yes except next year it will be the hundred percent biased towards the front yeah it's true very and their ad that was an original thought the ratings are in retreat true I know one heard that joke nobody didn't no no I was talking now you talked over my joke I did don't ever do that again oh that's it you'll never be on special report but I will all right


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